Though we have never really been deep close friends, just the brother of so and so who does a lot for the church. I do miss the few times we spent a few quick seconds, maybe in the hall exchanging small talk. nothing significant. What I recall often was the lyrics to a song on "the wire" ,,,, "if I fall will they catch me or watch me fall" . You and I shared the significants of the song during the building of the new church on Shell Road, I believed that was what we were referencing too. Maybe it was, maybe there were other, just possibly another theme was being referenced that I was not privy to or at any level of relationship with you to go any deeper than that small talk we shared. You really never let many people close in and share the deep stuff. Glad you acknowledged it in this blog. Wish you would have let someone in, hell anybody in, then maybe all our lives would have been different. You life crashed hard and fast. Others on the perifery "sp" we spiraled more slowly but surely. I slowly lost my feeling for a connection with God and end the end, I realized I was a hypocrite who showed up to self glorify myself in service ministy and the gratitude people gave me for doing. Yea, I looked on the surface of being a strong christian and servent but I was lost and doing church for the wrong reasons. It destroyed my marriage, then it slowly destroyed my since of purpose.. adrift... void. No it didn't happen fast. It was like putting a frog in cold water then lighting a fire under it. As things got hot, I never noticed the change. It just happened. the boiling point of death was the realization that I lost my connection with God and was lost in the wilderness of hypocricy.. so I walked away... wondering. I miss you PB. Wish I could get out of the way of my pride in find a way back., Blessings to you.
IMO, this is 1 of the greatest replies I've ever gotten...because it's from the heart - after searching & finding something within. I too look forward to you getting out of your way...been there. I wish a lot had been different too...all I can do is learn & live again. I hope you do the same. Thx for the honest reply. b
I've read the many terrible articles on the situation that took place. People make mistakes it happens all the time only difference is your secret was revealed. Doesn't make it right but what people fail to realize is you are a human being of the flesh. The part I admire is how you and your family handled the situation in such a adverse time of your life's and you guys did it together as a covenant sticking together. I could speculate on the situation but it's really none of my business. I know I can honestly say this. My marriage was in complete disarray and the Lord led my wife and son to you and your church (Genesis) when it was located at Regal Theater. They loved it from day one. As for myself I was lost and wanted nothing to do with Church. When I decided to go to Church I chose to go elsewhere. I went to 7 different Churches in the area, nothing felt right and I didn't feel like I fit in and nobody made me feel at home so I decided to give your Church a chance only because my son Jordan asked me one Saturday night while we were talking if I could do him a favor and I said sure son what is it? He proceeded to ask me if I would go to Church with him and mommy tomorrow. How could I break the heart of my 8 yr old son. I went the next day and as I walked in I knew that was my home. I could feel it in my whole body and when I walked into the auditorium you shook my hand and said good morning and I felt a strong connection from the moment our hands touched. I hadn't felt that way in over 10 yrs. Bob if it wasn't for you going through a difficult time in your life being humbled yet being strong enough to pick up the pieces and begin a new beginning at Genesis I can honestly say my marriage would of ended and I wouldn't be the man I am now. I owe this all to GOD and YOU. If you or your family ever need anything I'm here as a friend and brother through the good times and the bad. Thanks for keeping it real. I love you brotha, God bless ...
3 comments:
Though we have never really been deep close friends, just the brother of so and so who does a lot for the church. I do miss the few times we spent a few quick seconds, maybe in the hall exchanging small talk. nothing significant. What I recall often was the lyrics to a song on "the wire" ,,,, "if I fall will they catch me or watch me fall" . You and I shared the significants of the song during the building of the new church on Shell Road, I believed that was what we were referencing too. Maybe it was, maybe there were other, just possibly another theme was being referenced that I was not privy to or at any level of relationship with you to go any deeper than that small talk we shared. You really never let many people close in and share the deep stuff. Glad you acknowledged it in this blog. Wish you would have let someone in, hell anybody in, then maybe all our lives would have been different. You life crashed hard and fast. Others on the perifery "sp" we spiraled more slowly but surely. I slowly lost my feeling for a connection with God and end the end, I realized I was a hypocrite who showed up to self glorify myself in service ministy and the gratitude people gave me for doing. Yea, I looked on the surface of being a strong christian and servent but I was lost and doing church for the wrong reasons. It destroyed my marriage, then it slowly destroyed my since of purpose.. adrift... void. No it didn't happen fast. It was like putting a frog in cold water then lighting a fire under it. As things got hot, I never noticed the change. It just happened. the boiling point of death was the realization that I lost my connection with God and was lost in the wilderness of hypocricy.. so I walked away... wondering. I miss you PB. Wish I could get out of the way of my pride in find a way back., Blessings to you.
Gary R
IMO, this is 1 of the greatest replies I've ever gotten...because it's from the heart - after searching & finding something within. I too look forward to you getting out of your way...been there. I wish a lot had been different too...all I can do is learn & live again. I hope you do the same. Thx for the honest reply. b
Pastor B,
I've read the many terrible articles on the situation that took place. People make mistakes it happens all the time only difference is your secret was revealed. Doesn't make it right but what people fail to realize is you are a human being of the flesh. The part I admire is how you and your family handled the situation in such a adverse time of your life's and you guys did it together as a covenant sticking together. I could speculate on the situation but it's really none of my business. I know I can honestly say this. My marriage was in complete disarray and the Lord led my wife and son to you and your church (Genesis) when it was located at Regal Theater. They loved it from day one. As for myself I was lost and wanted nothing to do with Church. When I decided to go to Church I chose to go elsewhere. I went to 7 different Churches in the area, nothing felt right and I didn't feel like I fit in and nobody made me feel at home so I decided to give your Church a chance only because my son Jordan asked me one Saturday night while we were talking if I could do him a favor and I said sure son what is it? He proceeded to ask me if I would go to Church with him and mommy tomorrow. How could I break the heart of my 8 yr old son. I went the next day and as I walked in I knew that was my home. I could feel it in my whole body and when I walked into the auditorium you shook my hand and said good morning and I felt a strong connection from the moment our hands touched. I hadn't felt that way in over 10 yrs. Bob if it wasn't for you going through a difficult time in your life being humbled yet being strong enough to pick up the pieces and begin a new beginning at Genesis I can honestly say my marriage would of ended and I wouldn't be the man I am now. I owe this all to GOD and YOU. If you or your family ever need anything I'm here as a friend and brother through the good times and the bad. Thanks for keeping it real. I love you brotha, God bless ...
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